Best Facebook Status Messages - Huge Collection

Sometimes, you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince..

Another way to lose control is to ignore something when you should address it.

You can have everything in life you want if you will just help enough other people get what they want.

Common looking people are the best in the world: that is the reason the Lord makes so many of them.

Short words are best and the old words when short are best of all.

Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, write on walls, and get poked by people you don’t know.

I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.

just because you have the right to do something does not make it the right thing to do.

some times its simpler to just say whats on your mind, than to pretend its not in your heart

Lord, give me strength & guidance that I may do things according to Your will. Let me put all worries aside as I may face each day w/ conviction & faith in You.

People who compete with others have no goals of their own… Stop competing. Set personal goals for yourself and never quit until they have been conquered!

In a world full of wrong choices, someday, someone will come into your life who will make you say… this time, I got it right

I hate it when I`m reading & I start thinking about something & I have no idea what I just read.

Enjoy your own life without comparing it with that of another.

I wish people would realize that Facebook is a tool to keep people in touch when distance separates them. It’s not for personal wars.

thinks when someone thinks your best isn’t good enough you realize they’re not worth your best to begin with

When you care about someone you won’t give up on them even when they have given up on them self.

Choose your friends wisely, for they can be a direct reflection of you. We are the average of the 5 people that we spend most of our time with. Think about it.

I thought I wanted a long career, turns out I just wanted cash money.

I used to be schizophrenic, but we’re all right now.

If the world ends in 2012, the last thought of America’s youth will be “But I didn’t get to update my Facebook status today!”

3 Things to Control: – Tongue; – Temper; – Temptation.

says that today, if you see someone without a smile, you should give them one of yours. *smiles*

F.A.M.I.L.Y is one of the strongest words anyone can say, because the letters of FAMILY means Father And Mother I Love You..

Never argue with an idiot, People watching won’t be able to tell the difference.

A hug is like a boomerang – you get it back right away.

Lord, don’t move that mountain just give me the strength to climb.

Only God can turn a MESS into a MESSAGE, a TEST into a TESTIMONY, a TRIAL into a TRIUMPH, a VICTIM into a VICTORY

I have no status. Me, myself and I can’t seem to agree what’s on our mind.

Facebook shouldn’t ask ‘what’s on your mind?’ it should ask ‘who’s on your mind?

you know you’re bored when you’re flipping through random statuses just for the heck of it

Dont you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?

Alcohol does NOT make you fat…it makes you lean…against tables,chairs,walls, floors and ….Ugly people!!!

I guess if you spoke your mind, you’d be speechless

Yes my Facebook status was about you, then you commented on it and my heart just stopped for a second! <3

The best thing about my status is that by the time you realize it says nothing at all, you will have already read it. hahahaha

Like this status if Facebook is one of your daily activity’s

every time i get used to a version of Facebook…they change it again.

i don’t care if people don’t like me. because i am not a Facebook to be LIKED :dd

Why is it we have so many Facebook friends but talk to very few of them??

is wondering What if Tomorrow never comes? who will take care of my FACEBOOK profile?

I’m changing my Facebook name to “no-one” so when i send people friend requests it will say “no-one wants to be your friend”

The awkward moment when you’ve already said “what?” three times and still have no idea what the person said, so you just agree.
*Phone vibrates at home.* Barely hear it. *Phone vibrates at school* Damn earthquake!

Reasons I check my voicemail: 1% to hear the message. 99% to get rid of that annoying icon.
Saying “Oh yeah, I remember” when you really don’t.

If my room is clean, it means that Facebook is not working.

Fact: You always get hurt the moment you begin to care.

I’m officially naming my remote control “Waldo”

Those ninja movements you make when you’re about to drop your phone.

oh…CRAP!! I got up too late to workout again. That makes 12 years in a row now!!

Whenever you think about giving up, think about why you’ve kept going for this long.

When people see you as a competition, you already won.

One of the simplest ways to stay happy is to let go of the things that make you sad.

Always remember, that no matter how useless you think you are, you are still someone’s reason to smile.

“They dared me to” is always a valid excuse.

LIKE IF you say “never mind” when you don’t feel like repeating yourself.

The biggest mistake I have made in my life is letting people stay in my life far longer than they deserve…

Mornings come in 3 sizes: (1) Early (2) Too Early (3) Way Too Early.

Every relationship has its problems, but what makes it perfect is when things are bad, and you still want to be together.

Sometimes you have to forget how you feel and remember what you deserve.

When I say “The other day” It can mean any time from yesterday, to 364 days ago.

When God asks what you’ve done with your life, try not to say “Didn’t you read my statuses?”
The guy who invented underwear must have sounded crazy.

‎”Nobody listens to me….” – Yellow traffic light

The reason why people give up so fast is because they tend to look at how far they still have to go, instead of how far they have gotten.

That awkward moment when someone isn’t txting you back and then you see them update their status from mobile…

The biggest lie I tell myself is…”I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”

Just because I don’t talk to you, or text you first, doesn’t mean I don’t miss you. I’m just waiting for you to miss me.

That awkward moment when someone is trying to get on the elevator but the doors are closing and they make eye contact with you.

It’s amazing how easily “I have 10 minutes to waste before I need to leave” accidentally turns into “oh crap I’m running late.”

Common sense is a lot like deodorant. The people who need it most, never use it.

That lazy moment when you don’t eat because you don’t feel like cooking.

You know what’s worse than slow internet? NOTHING.

There are only two times when I want to be with you. Now, and forever.

Relationship Killers : Insecurity, trust issues, Facebook, Twitter, jealousy, lack of communication, assumptions.

Over-thinking ruins you. Ruins the situation, twists things around, makes you worry and just makes everything much worse than it actually is.

When two people share a dislike of another person, it brings them closer.
Find Voldemort: (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘) (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} (‘} LIKE if you found him!

A life without dreaming, is a life without meaning.

Yea, I end a Facebook conversation by hitting the (LIKE) button on the last comment.

Pick a number, double it, add 10, divide it by 2, then minus it by the number you started with. LIKE if you got 5.

When an intoxicated person is blabbering, 60% of whatever he/she says is true.

LIKE if you don’t ring the doorbell… You just text or call to say you’re outside.

Going to bed and counting how many hours of sleep you’re going to get.

Admit it, At some point in your life, you stuck a ball up your shirt and pretended you were pregnant.

IF THIS IS YELLING & this is talking… I woNDeR wHat THis sOUnDs LikE?

That awkward moment when you get home and look at yourself in the mirror thinking…. did I really look like this all day?

The heart attack when you’re in bed almost sleeping, holding your phone in your hand and it suddenly vibrates.

Don’t you hate that feeling when you close your eyes to apply shampoo, and get paranoid that someone will kill you in the shower.

Even when I’m home alone, I still answer Jeopardy questions out loud.

Whenever I try cleaning my room I either end up making a bigger mess, or just playing with the stuff I thought I lost.

My next house will have no kitchen – just vending machines and an extremely large trash can.

I tend to get along with people who are fluent in sarcasm.

If I tell you, I love you, can I keep you forever

(I) AM (L)UCKY T(O) HA(V)E A FRI(E)ND LIKE YO(U).

٩(•̮̮̃•̃)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃-̃)۶ ٩(●̮̮̃•̃)۶ ٩(͡๏̯͡๏)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃•̃)۶ Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.

Love me without fear / Trust me without questioning / Need me without demanding / Want me without restrictions / Accept me without change

Hollywood is where they shoot too many pictures and not enough actors.

I have seven apartments in the house to keep in a state fit to be inspected everyday by Gentlemen.

I like a girl to look relaxed. Tight jeans and rock t-shirts are cute!

A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them.

A brain is a society of very small, simple modules that cannot be said to be thinking, that are not smart in themselves. But when you have a network of them together, out of that arises a kind of smartness.

Everything happens to everybody sooner or later if there is time enough.

Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it

If love is a language of the heart, my heart speaks volumes.

Come live in my heart, and pay no rent.

Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray. You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away.

I hope life isn’t a joke because I don’t get it……

Nothing is permanent in this wicked world, not even our troubles

Had an awesome time. You tell me to show up and all I have to do is drink beer, play guitar all day and I can lift weights and you’re going to pay me for this!

Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.

We won’t stop until somebody calls the cops and even then we’ll start again and just pretend that nothing ever happened.

Me without you is like a nerd without braces, A shoe without laces, A Sentence Without Spaces. Love is love, and it’s gonna stay that way forever.

I am the baddest, coolest, meanest, but honest princess you’ll ever meet

I am to daggy to be cool…so i shall remain AWESOME

downloading awesomeness
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100% complete

this status is so crazily superly amazingly sweetly awesomely cooly frickin killer! \,,/ (>_<) \,,/

comes with a Warning label. It states: WARNING: Contents contain severe awesomeness. Please store at room temperature. Contents are flammable. Keep out of fire.

I am who I am by the Grace of God so don’t try to change me, for I am who God wants me to be! Not who you think I should be!

I never said i was perfect.. I just said i was awesome!! =P

If you’re awesome and you know it, give me a hell yeah!

People say I’m crazy, I just tell them “I know, I’m completely mad and bonkers! But, all the best people are!”

I Don’t try to be Awesome. Awesome tries to be me.

I may not be the most popular person, the most beautiful person, or the most liked person, but why the hell should I care when Ive got the most awesome friends!

So I went to the Dr today bad news.I was born with something called “awesomeness” ya I have to much of it,I have to give some away Comment below if ya want some

I’m not short and I’m not bossy, I’m just fun sized and have a wonderful personality, THE ATTITUDE REALLY BRINGS ME OUT THOUGH, ‘mu ah’

Just sitting here on the corner of AWESOME & BOMB Diggity!!

Doesn’t it bug you that my profile picture is staring at you?

You know you’re AWESOME when people can’t stop mentioning your name.

Well, I never wanted to be a princess, but… you know… if the crown fits… =)

This reading by smile you make to wanted i and person nice really a are you.Confused?NOW READ IT BACKWARDS.

Whenever I have a bad day I just think of these people.

If you see a defense team with dirt and mud on their backs they’ve had a bad day.

The worst is death, and death will have his day.

I was planning to do something today, but I haven’t finished doing nothing from yesterday.

There’s nothing wrong or evil about having a bad day. There’s everything wrong with making others have to have it… with you.

You can have a bad day, but as soon as you set foot on that stage it’s joyous.

No matter how bad things get, you got to go on living, even if it kills you.

What a Day may bring a Day may take away.

Some days are for living. Others are for getting through.

hates it when you think nothing else can go wrong, and then you find out that there is a whole new level of wrongness you haven’t discovered yet!

My silence talks more than I do

Life is so hard that is why you have friends there to support you and make you feel better when you had a very bad day.

could someone tell me why i put myself through all this?..because i can’t.

Do you ever wish you could just hit pause, then rewind, then erase?!

Any bad day can be cured by puppies!